Leave your comments on Neil's column in our Columnists Guestbook:

 

A choice is something we learn to make from a very early age and something we end up doing with monotonous regularity without even realising it. Naturally there are consequences involved especially where others are concerned and sometimes we are often left wondering why we decided to choose what we did in the first place. A lot of the time we are simply left with no other option and whether it be good or bad, we choose what we think is best at the time for the given situation that we find ourselves in.

As a result of being an older parent with a 4 year old child, the methods of child raising are vastly different to what they were when I was that age over 35 years ago, and the methods and manner of discipline for example have changed and in the process, my thinking has also had to change, however difficult it may be, simply because I don’t know any other way. There is no definitive book or guide as such on parenthood or being the perfect parent, which I believe there never will be, as we are all different as individuals, parents and so are our children.

However, I’ve begun to learn that the choices we make as children and the manner in which our parents instill this into us, affect us into adulthood as we grow older. Over the last few months, a very knowledgeable person in this field, who I consulted concerning my daughter’s rather odd behaviour at the age of 4, who as far as I am concerned is 4 going on 44 and tells her parents how to run the house and their lives, suggested we start giving her the choice option. Screaming and shouting don’t work; smacking was getting tiresome and was having absolutely no effect. The only people feeling pain were her parents. So, we started with the choice option, nothing dramatic, but in the eyes and mind of a 4 year old it seems to have helped dramatically. There is no more shouting or ranting in my house and there is no more smacking. We’ve tried little things, ‘if you choose to talk to me like that, you choose not to watch television this evening’, ‘if you choose not to pick up your clothes, you choose not to have them washed tomorrow’, ‘if you choose to eat that biscuit, then you choose to eat your supper’. It’s amazing how well it works.

You can all relax; this is not intended to be a psychology lesson! But, something has happened to me in the last week and the choice the person has made, or whoever is advising her on this, has seriously affected me and made me extremely angry.

About 6 months ago, an announcement was made in the Press that Celine Dion would be touring South Africa in February this year. She had 1 concert scheduled in Johannesburg on 14th February and a couple of others in another City not far from Johannesburg. Well, I jumped at the opportunity of seeing her and rushed off to go and buy 2 tickets for my wife and myself. We both like her music and both appreciate her as an artist, so it was the ideal opportunity. The tickets were not cheap either, but then I suppose an artist of Celine’s caliber does not come cheap!

Shortly thereafter, and as a lot of ABBAMAILers will know, I got a bee in my bonnet and chose to visit Australia in February. Off I toodled and booked my ticket to leave South Africa on Friday 15th February to co-incide with seeing Celine Dion on 14th February. Everything was hunky-dory and life carried on.

Until last week.

I received an email apologising for the inconvenience, but advising me that the concert had been moved from 14th February to 29th February, with a pathetic explanation that the original venue was a security risk! Now this gets my back up, Elton John performed at the same venue in the middle of January and Julio Iglesias performed there in November, along with numerous other International Superstars on previous occasions.

So? Hello, is Celine Dion the biggest performer in the Universe and can’t perform where Julio Iglesias, Elton John and the like have?

I think not.

I’ve since learned, that an extra show was added for Johannesburg at the end of February at another venue in Johannesburg due to public demand and the planned show for 14th February has been moved to the same venue on the 29th February. This is all good and well, but I won’t be in the country as I’d planned an overseas trip around the dear lady’s original concert.

In the email I was told where to go to replace my already issued tickets for the re-scheduled concert which I duly did. I explained to the kind lady behind the counter that I will not be in the country at the time of the re-scheduled concert, I even had my air-ticket with me, and could I please have a refund? My wife had made it very clear she would not go to the concert without me as a matter of principle. The answer I got was ‘No, Sir, sorry, no refunds. We have a list of people waiting to see Celine Dion, if you don’t want the tickets, we’ll sell them on, this is beyond our control.’

Well, I chose to take them, and the irony is, I’ve chosen to get rid of them in whatever manner possible and the poor people that choose to end up with them, will get to see Celine Dion, at a heavy cost. People are offering nearly 5 times the amount I paid for these tickets, which quite frankly is ludicrous. Seeing that I’ve been inconvenienced at her expense thanks to her choice, I hope she feels happy about the choice either she or her Management Company have made. I’m happy with my choice.

The sad thing is, Michelle is more the Celine Dion fan in the house than I am, and she was really looking forward to seeing her. I can’t make her go and see the show with a friend, that’s her choice, but there is one thing I know for sure, Michelle has said this leaves a bitter taste in her mouth especially in light of the fact that she has heard that the original date of 14th February is apparently a Gala Event at the original venue!

That is Celine’s right and choice, if she feels she is powerful enough that she can do this to her fans for no real apparent reason, if it was life threatening we would understand, but not this pathetic lame excuse. Michelle has made it quite clear to me; she has no interest in the woman or her music any longer. That’s her choice, she’s allowed to do that and I’ll respect that.

However, I’d like to think that by choosing to do what Celine Dion has, she realises that she will suffer the consequences. She’s actually lost 2 fans, I’ve been messed around with an overseas trip due to this and my wife has had an evening out ruined. I have no doubt there are many others who feel this way. That’s our choice as a result of her choice.

I sincerely hope that Celine Dion and her Management Company realise that she is not invincible and quite frankly, the arses you kick on the way up are the ones you kiss on the way down!

But then, that’s choices, and her choice. You’ll never keep everybody happy, so when you make a choice, think about it long and hard, I find myself doing so these days.

Next month I’ll be writing from Sydney, hopefully, with a bit of ABBA included in my column for March!

Neil